The Trust Equation: “I don’t care what you know until I know that you care”

Trust: Unlock the Secrets of Human Connection

Trust is fundamental to our connection with others, underpinning every successful relationship, every thriving organization, and every meaningful interaction. Theodore Roosevelt is quoted as coining the phrase, “People don’t care what you know until they know that you care.”

If trust is the bedrock upon which all lasting success is built, how do we build it? How do we maintain it? How do we repair it? I’ve been reflecting on the brilliant work of David Maister, Charles Green, and Robert Galford in their book, “The Trusted Advisor,” and their powerful Trust Equation.

This Trust Equation offers a clear framework for understanding the components of trust.

  • T = Trustworthiness: The outcome we seek.
  • C = Credibility: Do people believe what I say? This isn’t just about technical expertise; it’s about being honest and complete, both intellectually and emotionally. It’s about demonstrating that I understand the facts, but also that I understand the human element.
  • R = Reliability: Do I do what I say I’ll do? It’s the consistent delivery, the repeated experience of promises kept. It’s the bedrock of dependability.
  • I = Intimacy: Can people feel safe sharing their vulnerabilities with me? This isn’t about romantic intimacy, but about emotional closeness and honesty. It’s about creating a space where people feel understood and valued.
  • S = Self-Orientation: This is the denominator, the factor that can erode trust most quickly. Am I focused on myself, or on serving others? Am I listening to understand, or to respond?

What strikes me most about this equation is its simplicity and its profound truth. It highlights that trust is multifaceted. I can be highly credible, but if I’m self-oriented, trust will suffer. I can be reliable, but if I lack intimacy, I’ll never build deep connections. I can be the most transparent (intimate) partner, but if I don’t do what I say I’ll do, trust is shattered.

Why this matters

In a world increasingly driven by transactional interactions, we are at risk of losing sight of the human element. We can forget that people don’t buy what you do; they buy why you do it. And they can only truly connect with your “why” when they trust you.

Think about the leaders you admire. They don’t just possess technical skills; they inspire trust. They are credible, reliable, intimate, and they put the needs of others before their own.

How can I apply this in my own life?

  • Focus on others: I must actively listen, ask open-ended questions, and genuinely care about the people I serve.
  • Be consistent: My actions must align with my words. I need to build a track record of reliability.
  • Be vulnerable: I need to share my own struggles and create a safe space for others to do the same.
  • Check my motives: Am I driven by a desire to serve, or by a desire for personal gain?

David Maister’s Trust Equation is a powerful reminder that building trust is an ongoing process. It requires conscious effort and a genuine commitment to serving others.

May we all strive to build organizations and relationships built on trust, where people feel valued, understood, and inspired. Because when we do, we create a world where everyone can thrive.

Want more? Check out this Trust Equation video from the THNK School of Leadership: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xXWDl0Vik48

Stepping Away to Step Up: Why Renewal is Your Secret Weapon

Recharge and Refresh to Enhance Your Impact.

Life can be a whirlwind sometimes. Work deadlines loom, errands pile up, and suddenly it feels like you haven’t taken a real breath in days, weeks, even months. It’s during these times that I find myself craving renewal. Take a deep breath while you think about that word…renewal.

Now, renewal might not sound like the most exciting thing on the to-do list, but hear me out. It’s not about sitting in a bubble bath for thirty minutes (although that has its merits). It’s about consciously choosing to step away from the hamster wheel, even if it’s just for a little while, to come back feeling refreshed and ready to tackle anything.

Think about it. Have you ever tried to write a creative piece when your brain feels like mush? Or tried to have a productive conversation when you’re running on fumes? It rarely ends well. We need time to recharge, refocus, and reconnect with ourselves in order to truly thrive.

Here’s the thing, renewal doesn’t have to be a grand gesture. It can be as simple as:

  • Taking a walk in nature: Immersing yourself in the sights and sounds of the outdoors can be incredibly calming and restorative.
  • Putting your phone down and reading a book: Escaping into a good story can help you de-stress and gain new perspectives.
  • Trying a new recipe: Engaging in a creative activity can spark joy and get your creative juices flowing again.
  • Spending time with loved ones: Connecting with those closest to you provides a sense of belonging and support.

Even small changes to your routine can have a big impact. Instead of scrolling through social media before bed, try some light stretching or reading. Replace your usual commute with a scenic bike ride.

The key is to find what works for you and make it a priority. Remember, renewal isn’t selfish, it’s essential. It’s the key to maintaining your energy, creativity, and overall well-being. So next time you’re feeling burnt out, don’t push yourself further. Step away, recharge, and come back stronger than ever.

I’m heading outside now to breathe in the crisp February air and renew my focus for the week ahead. How will you RENEW?

Susan

p.s. Looking for a book to guide your journey? Check out: Renewal: How Nature Awakens Our Creativity, Compassion, and Joy by Andrés R Edwards

The Audience Arc: A Balancing Act for Success

Master the balancing act of needs using the Audience Arc

In today’s dynamic business landscape, navigating an “audience arc” is crucial for driving high-impact initiatives. This arc applies to any scenario where you need to engage different levels of your organization. Regardless of your situation, there are three core entities to consider as your craft solutions for your customers:

  • The Enterprise: The overarching goals and vision of the organization.
  • The Team: The collective effort and expertise of your department or project group.
  • The Individuals: The unique perspectives and motivations of each person involved.

Now, here’s a powerful framework that can elevate your success:

The Balancing Act: Decisiveness with Context Meets Collaboration for Innovation

Part 1: Decisiveness/Smart Risk-Taking vs. Organizational Navigation/Collaboration

Effective leadership requires a delicate balance. On one hand, you need to be decisive and willing to take calculated risks. However, it’s equally important to navigate the organizational landscape effectively. Collaborative decision-making that considers various viewpoints can lead to stronger results and increased buy-in.

Part 2: Honoring the Past While Embracing the Future

Balancing Tradition with Innovation:

  • Past: Respect What’s Been Done Before: Building on past successes and learning from previous experiences is crucial. Ask yourself, “Has someone already tackled this challenge? Can we leverage their efforts?”
  • Future: Embrace Innovation and Learning: Don’t be afraid to break new ground and experiment. Every situation presents opportunities to learn and push the boundaries.

Conclusion: Mastering the Audience Arc

By understanding the audience arc, consistently creating delicate balance between decisiveness and collaboration, tradition and innovation, you can navigate your way to success in any situation. Winning strategies require considering all three entities – the enterprise, the team, and the individuals. Remember, it’s all about finding the sweet spot between calculated risks and well-coordinated execution. So go forth, analyze, diagnose, plan, and lead your team to high-impact success!

The Four Agreements: Unlocking Your Best Self

Sometimes a book can change your life. The Four Agreements, by Don miguel Ruiz changed mine.

This international bestseller takes less than an hour read, and provides a simple (not easy) roadmap for releasing long patterns of self-judgment, worry, and self-limiting beliefs.

The Four Agreements are:

  1. Be Impeccable With Your Word.
  2. Don’t Take Anything Personally.
  3. Don’t Make Assumptions.
  4. Always Do Your Best.

A few thoughts:

Carpe Momentum: Two tips to accelerate success

“I could be so successful, if only I had more time…”

Have you ever started the sentence, “If only I had more time…” then finished that sentence with realization that you would fill that extra time with more hassled, stressful tasks that would leave you even more exhausted than you already are?

Time, precious time

Author Harvey Mackay says that time is the one commodity that we can’t reproduce, alter, capture or revisit. We each have the same quantity of time on a given day, day after day. How we use that time makes all the difference.

Think about the Food Network television show, “Chopped,” where several chefs open a mystery box with a tiny window of time and a mission to create fabulous food fare. Invariably, one contestant groans as the clock runs out and Chef Ted shouts, “Time’s up!”  The contestant stares at the unfinished dish below and states as if it’s the first time this has ever happened, “I ran out of time” as their reason for not including all of the required ingredients on their plate, or for not cooking their dish to the judges’ satisfaction. Each chef had the same ingredients, the same cookingtimesup station, the same pantry, and the same amount of time. Why were the other chefs able to finish on time with the intended delicious outcome, while Joe/Jane Too-Late is standing with a raw slab of pork on the station?

So how to make the most of this precious, limited resource? How do super-successful time managers seem to breeze through tasks and still have time to show up at the kids’ soccer games or catch a concert in the park?  Continue reading